Rebecca Duvall

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Who Would You Be?

 

My 10 year old son loves to ask me questions like:

Would you rather eat a cat or a dog?

Would you rather clean vomit or poop?

Would you rather get stabbed in the foot or hand?

Whose better, Batman or Spiderman?

questionsA few weeks ago he asked me “If you could be anyone, who would you be?”  After a few seconds of thinking I said “That’s easy, I would be me!”  With a puzzled look on his face he asked me why I would want to be me if I could be anyone.  I smiled and told him being me meant I got to be his mom and I thought that was pretty cool.

I believe God prompted my son to ask me that question that day.  You see, I’ve been struggling with my place in this world lately.  Questioning if I should be doing more than ‘play’ mom.  I’ve been feeling less than everyone else.  Feeling as if I need to be contributing more to this world.

In the moment my son asked me the question, I realized being a mom is what I enjoy.  Of course I want to continue doing what I enjoy.  Anything else that comes along in this lifetime is an extra perk or bonus.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not saying being a mom is easy or always wonderfully pleasant.  It’s usually complete chaos and overly exhausting.  That’s what I love most about being a mom.  There’s never a dull moment.  I would pick being surrounded by my family, filled with chaos and exhausted, over boredom 95% of the time.  Not 100% of the time because everyone needs a break from time to time, and I do look forward to those times just as much as being thrown into the thick of it with my crazy weird family.  I am the queen of crazy and weird and I am the one who taught them how to be that way.

When I say chaos I don’t mean it in a bad way….usually.  I mean everyone needing something at the same time; Five things going on at once.  My favorite part about being a mom is having many things to get done and figure out, knowing God has it all covered.  I love seeing God work within my chaos.  What’s hard is when I forget God is in the middle of it and think I have to do it all on my own.

Praise God for the moments I begin to feel alone or overwhelmed and He steps in to reassure me He is there and He loves me.  By a gentle whisper, a song, a friend, a story or even my son.  Isn’t it beautiful how God can change our perspective in a matter of seconds?  How has God helped you see things differently recently?

“And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever” John 14:16

My prayer for us today ~ Father God, I thank you for the gift of family; mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, children and all our other family members.  I pray we always remember they love us. I pray we see them through Your eyes Lord, when it feels difficult to love them, Amen.

* My answers to the above questions: Whichever is smaller;  whichever is less runny; hand because I wouldn’t be able to do mommy chores for awhile; neither, Ironman rocks!

 

In Memory of…

Burning CandleIt’s been 11 years since my mom passed of Breast Cancer.  It seems like one day she was feisty and full of life and the next she was horrifically ill, fighting for her life.  Her battle was only 9 months long.  At the time it felt like forever. Looking back, it was the blink of an eye.  I’m thankful she didn’t have to go through it any longer than she did.

I was very close to my mom.  We didn’t always get along or see eye to eye, but we were close.  I told her everything.  Yes, everything.  Well, except for maybe a year or two while I was in High School I might have left out a few minor details about a couple of things. 😉 Even when I did things I knew she wouldn’t like.  Whether I was happy, sad, angry or excited I shared it with her.  She always knew how I should handle things.  Unfortunately, I rarely took her advice.

The first few years after my mom passed I would often think to call her to tell her something about my day.  Then realize she was gone.  Talking to my mom, almost every day, to no talking at all was hard.  I suddenly had no one to tell me what to do.  Yes, I know I said I rarely listened, but it helped me know where to stand with things.  If she said I should get my hair cut and let my natural curl show I would keep it long and straighten it.  If she told me the fastest way to get somewhere was by the freeway I would use the city streets.  Of course that sounds corny, but that’s how I did things when it came to my mom.  I drove her nuts!

I remember dancing around to music with my mom when I was little, maybe 4 or 5 years old.  Back then it was Jim Reeves ‘Yonder Comes a Sucker’ or ‘Mexican Joe’.  My mom enjoyed music.  When I got older and moved out I continued to listen to some of the same music she did, butdance Twist NEVER would have admitted it.  Music from Abba, Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton.  To this day I still enjoy listening to it.  It brings back such wonderful memories, especially Jim Reeves.  I have all of these songs on my ipod and usually have it on shuffle so I can be pleasantly surprised when it comes on.  It instantly brings me back to my mom and me dancing around in the living room.  The Twist was her favorite dance, which we did quite often.

I wasn’t a Christian when my mom passed.  So we didn’t talk about eternal life in heaven or Jesus before she passed.  I do know she meet with a Pastor of a local church a few times during the last few months of her life.  Based on what the Pastor said after she passed, I do believe she accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior.  I look forward to one day being reunited with her to catch up on things.

It’s hard to lose a family member or close friend.  It’s easy to get upset with God for taking them from us.  What I do when I miss my mom, so much it hurts, is think back on the times we did have together.  It always puts a smile on my face and feels as if she is still there.  I like to guess what she would say to me when I do something odd or stupid, which is quite often.  That always makes me laugh.  What do you do to help when you miss someone you’ve lost?

I find this passage of scripture comforting.  I hope you do as well.

‘Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.  According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep.  For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.  Therefore encourage one another with these words. ~ 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

heaven

My prayer for us today ~ Father God, thank you for the gift of life. I pray we love each other the way you love us and we appreciate each and every moment we have with one another, Amen.

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